Long story sorry

So I think I am in love? With someone else.

I have been married to my husband for 5 yrs now. And we have 2 kids together. Throughout these 5 yrs he was kinda abusive he would take his anger out on my kids and emotionally hurt me as well.

Anyways fast forward, for about a month now I have been talking to a friend of mine from 2010. (He’s in the army and his wife just had recently left him after being together for 3 yrs. so they are in the process of getting divorced). She had a daughter of her own from a different marriage. And that’s what made me fall in love with him because he loves kids and treat them as his own even tho they aren’t which is very rare for Hmong guys. right when we first talked we both just fell in love instantly. I’ve never felt this way before. Even when I was dating my husband.

This guy was the one who made me figure out that I am worth more then this and I deserve to be happy as well. He was the one who supported me through this. He told my to stand my ground and not let anyone force me into doing anything I don’t want. He gives me butterflies when I think and talk about him. I smile from ear to ear when I see his pictures.

I finally stepped up to my marriage and said I no longer want to marry him anymore (explaining why) and got my kids and left.

Well I am Hmong so it’s all about honor and having face so that people don’t shit talk about you behind your back. Which I could care less.

So my parents are forcing me to go back and marry my husband that I no longer love. And I told them to consider my feelings etc. they wouldn’t. I wanted to tell them so bad about my relationship with the other guy but he won’t let me say anything yet because if his situation in the Army and still legally married to his ex wife.

FYI husband is trying to make it work now that I left when I gave him 5 yrs to make it work.

Im very torn. I want to follow my heart and that is to be with the guy that treats me like his queen not his dog or a slave.

SOOO!!! I finally had the courage and decided to leave my state for a bit and visit him since it was perfect timing with my situation because he was off for about 1 week and 3 days. I wanted to see if he was actually serious about our relationship.

So I BOOKED A FLIGHT (so I’m kinda eloping but not really) to go visit him and he’s 17hrs away from me. I am bringing my 2 kids with me as well because he wanted to meet my kids. Which I think is still a bit to early but I guess it is what it is.

I am leaving tomorrow morning at 1am so that my parents won’t be able to stop me. My siblings is all in it with me as well they said anything that makes me happy they are all in. (I have 2 brothers and 1 sister).

It’s not bad that I am doing this right? For my own happiness. Leaving now is gonna hurt my kids but Even if I stay with my husband I’m not going to happy so my kids are gonna know and its still going to hurt all of us the same as it is now. Mind as well leave early so time isn’t wasted for him and me.

I need help