We’ve been together 4 years, been through a lot and live together. We love each other, but I don’t know if we’re ‘in love’ anymore. I can’t tell if it’s genuine or a rough patch. I feel like affection and conversations are strained.

He’s broke my trust on numerous occasions. I feel like I can trust him again, but I’m now concerned it’s not that I trust him, it’s just that I don’t care anymore. So rather than me trusting him, it’s more that I can’t be bothered to stress about things. If he fucks up (again), it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t care to check his phone or computer. If I find something it’ll break me, and if I don’t, I’ll be convinced he’s got better at hiding things.

I used to be mad that he stopped kissing me as much, or spending time with me. He works a lot, so spends a lot of time in the office. But now I find that I’m not bothered. I’m not bothered about eating dinner with him, when he sits in the lounge, I go to the bedroom etc.

We talked about our future, we had a m/c and we’ve both wanted a baby since. But now i’ve told him I don’t want to try anymore.

I don’t know if this can be fixed. I want to believe it can be. Please any advice, I don’t want to throw it away, but it’s eating away at me. I feel guilty for the way I’m feeling. I’m so lost, my family and friends love him. I’m scared if I leave it’ll be the biggest mistake I’ll ever make. Our relationship used to be so good.

Has anyone been through this?