Do I have any right to be upset?

Question

Idk if it’s my hormones or what but I’m so mad at my MIL. (Who isn’t tho, amiright? Lol jk) anyway, so we had pictures taken by a family friend for our baby announcement almost two weeks ago. Ever since then, my MIL has been nagging us about seeing the pictures. I finally got them back this past Monday night. We announced our pregnancy today. After I picked the pictures I wanted to use for our announcement and posted them, I sent her the link in private for the pictures so she could see them all. Y’all. SHE POSTED HER OWN ANNOUNCEMENT ON HER PAGE AND TAGGED US IN IT. Using one of the pictures from the link that I didn’t choose to post. I feel like she always has to be in on everything we do. Like can’t we just have our own moment?? I didn’t say anything, just vented to my husband. Please tell me if I’m being unreasonable and if you can relate??

Answer

I don’t get why MILs think they have the right to do these things. My baby wasn’t even an hour old and she took pictures and posted them to social media without asking and before we had even told all our family the baby had been born. You shouldn’t have to tell anyone not to do that. It’s your child, not hers. That’s what many MILs seem to forget. You’ll probably have to let this one go but just know going forward to set boundaries so there’s no question.

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I would be fuming!

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I think you have a right to be annoyed and a little upset. I’d feel the same way. I’m sure it’s not malicious intent, she’s just excited, but that wasn’t cool to do

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My first pregnancy, my MIL posted baby news on Facebook after we found out I was pregnant. My husband spoke to them and told them the news. They hadn’t even talked to me or said congratulations and posted on Facebook. My MIL actually posted our news literally the day after I peed on a stick and she hadn’t even spoke to me about it yet. Needless to say I went off and was very upset. I ended up having a miscarriage at 10 weeks and had to share the news. I was very upset. Now that I’m pregnant with our rainbow, I didn’t share the news until this Father’s Day and I told them they were not allowed to tell anyone. When I have the baby, I will have set boundaries, nobody posts delivery news, or pictures without my consent. My MIL has been overbearing since day 1 but the baby thing I finally had my freak out mental breakdown moment. Now with our rainbow and setting boundaries from the beginning, she’s been a lot nicer and respectful. I of course want her involved, but this our baby, not hers.

Answer

I would be pissed! My MIL did the same thing when I was pregnant with my daughter. Annoyed the hell out of me. She wanted to post pictures of my daughter before I did when she was born. She thought she had some type of right since she’s the grandmother. My mom let her know Id probably rip her head off if she did that. She has learned boundaries finally, it took a lot of fighting. I would def set boundaries with her, especially so she doesn’t post pics of the baby before you do

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My MIL did this too! Only we haven’t announced on social media. The only thing she didn’t do though was tag us in it. I was furious but like you didn’t say anything so now they are last to know everything. The gender, when the baby is born, etc. all baby privileges lost until they can prove they are trustworthy again. It is not okay to on any level to announce before the couple does in my opinion. It’s 2018 it’s common sense.

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with my oldest my mom n dad went to the ultrasound with us and were the first to know. My husband and I went to work later and and my mom had posted on fb announcing our news. We hadn't even told my hubby's family yet. needless to say I was livid, i seen the post while at work and my phone went flying. Almost 2.5 yrs later and she has just started asking if she can post stuff about our daughter. This time she was the first to know i was pregnant. I threatened her and told her i would never talk to her again if she tells anyone or posts it, so far so good (she has known for 6 weeks lol).

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How you feel is how you feel. My mom shared the news right after I did too. But she just shared my post. I’m sure she didn’t do it with malicious intent, just excited and probably thought the pictures were adorable.

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She's excited. And didn't post till after you did. And she probably wanted he friends to know. I say just let it go. It's a post on social media. Not that serious

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You definitely have a right to be upset, I'm sorry this happened.

Do I have any right to be upset?

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