So, let me start by saying I was adopted at birth. My adoptive mom and biological mom are related (cousins). I've had a relationship with my biological mom since I was like 2. Well, when I was around 16 or so, shit hit the fan between my mom and biomom. Long story short, apparently my entire adoptive family (other than my dad) hates my biological side. No one will actually tell me why. biomom and I have always had a good relationship (she like the fun aunt). I've never treated her like more than that. Even my SiLs hate my biomom and one of them has never even met her. I just don't get it. Anyways, my best friend is planning my shower and I'm to the point where I'm ready to scream at both sides because I don't want to be in the position where MY child ends up with separate birthdays and Christmases and every other freaking holiday all because my adoptive side hates the biological side even though my biological side has zero problem with the adoptive side.

sorry for the rant... I seriously just don't know what I should do at this point. I'm emotionally exhausted. This is my rainbow baby and that's already taking up most of my emotional and mental state. Should I just not invite either side? should I invite both and tell them to suck it up or GTFO? I don't know any more.

thanks for the help in advance!

UPDATE: My mom informed me today that if my biomom comes to the shower, she will not be coming. 😩