Almost forgetting I’m pregnant and not just dying
Over 37 weeks with these twins and I’m in so much pain. I can’t walk without help, contractions all day (real and BH) but cervix is still high and closed, shooting pain in my lady parts, headaches, extremely swollen extremities to the point where I can’t make a fist with my fat fingers and the absolute worst showed up yesterday: thrombosed hemorrhoids. Those hemorrhoids used to be just gross and not fun, but now they are the worst pain I’ve ever had and I have given birth before. I wouldn’t wish them on anyone and all I’ve been told is just to hang in there because I’m being induced this week and they can’t do anything about them until the babies are out. It just doesn’t seem right to be in SO much pain and basically crying on and off all day because you can’t sit on your rear, laying down causes severe hip pain, can’t stand up straight, can’t get giant belly submerged in the bath tub.
And I realized I’ve almost lost sight of the fact that we’re about to have two beautiful new babies because I’m so distracted from just being physically miserable. I wanted this weekend to be quality time with my first born, but instead I’m just struggling to exist in my body. So on top of everything, I’m getting depressed about that and having mom guilt. 😞😞😞
Just wanted to get that off my chest to a group of ladies who might actually understand what I’m going through.
(Anonymous because of butthole complaints 🤷🏼♀️)
Update: Just found out my induction appt might be bumped since they’re so busy. 😩 The good news just keeps coming. ☹️