- I had an ectopic pregnancy last January.

- Ever since I’ve been just receiving pregnancy announcements everywhere. It was really hard and made me very angry...

- I started trying like crazy for 2 months doing everything: ovulation tests, all the conceiving apps, logging all my symptoms, measuring my cervix. Of course nothing worked, I was completely obsessed.

- I was one week late. My cervix was up all week and I was fooled by an indent/bad pregnancy test. Then my close friend got a BFP and right after my got my period.

- Then it was decided: I needed to stop trying, at least for now. I had a long conversation with my partner and we even decided to not have more kids (we already have one).

- I was expecting my period that day. I made a pregnancy test to just keep the thought out and start looking for the best way to not conceive and... Positive.

- Everything looks fine. They already made 2 ultrasounds and everything looks just perfect. I will be 9 weeks tomorrow.

Right now I am just relaxing until I had a conversation with my mom: my cousin is 14 weeks pregnant. And it bothered me! I thought I was over this! Plus, I am pregnant too!

It makes me think about myself and my mental health. Am I really over this? Is it just my hormones? Or simply the fact that she got pregnant before?

I hate this so much! 😣😣😣😣