I’ve been drinking daily, often to the point of being very drunk, for oh, about the past 2 years. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety “officially” since I was 13. I’ve been hospitalized twice, age 16, and slowly but surely I was able to recover enough that I wanted to continue living. Well i started hanging out with friends who drank. And I was no innocent angel who never drank, trust me. It became a social thing. I would drink on weekends and stay sober when I had to work.

Well the past 2 years have kicked my ass. Everything from the death of my best friend to the death of my dog to my family losing their house to me going thru most of my savings to my dad being suicidal, my brother stealing Percocet, hoarding, and drinking and my mom smoking weed, taking pills depressed.

I have an amazing boyfriend who doesn’t drink. I mean he will occasionally but maybe once every few months? Regardless of this I’ve turned to alcohol to cope with all the stress and upset of what seems to be a never ending cycle. It’s gotten to the point that it has tainted my relationship and my social life. My boyfriend and I have been together 5 years. We’ve lived together 3. But he’s sick of my drinking bc I often get so drunk I get angry and say mean things and accuse him of shit when he’s never betrayed me once. He says he can’t watch me do this to myself and he’s getting to his breaking point. Said he will always love me but he can’t spend the rest of his life with an alcoholic.

Trust me all of this is well deserved. He’s put up with a lot more for a lot longer than I would have tables turned.

Anyways lol, my point is that today is my first day alcohol free. I am setting a goal for 15 days so I don’t feel overwhelmed. I’m nervous though. Anyone else with addiction problems here? Anyone recovered?