All I want is some help🙁

I left school three years ago after I had my son, right before my tenth grade year. Ever since my mother has been nagging me to go get my GED which is something I planned on doing, but due to my anxiety I kept putting off, it takes me awhile to talk myself out of this stuff.

Anyways my sister and mother are the only two people that could drive me there, I don’t have a car, or permit. I don’t have any friends, and I don’t really have any of my family, just my brother and sister in law and well they live the next state over. I asked them SEVERAL times if it would be a problem because I didn’t want to go and sign up and not be able to do it, like I said it takes a lot for me to talk myself into doing these things and I didn’t want to do it for no reason. They both said yes it won’t be a problem on the days one couldn’t take me the other one would, I was also told I’d get taken to get my permit since i need an ID to take my GED tests.

Y’all it has been two weeks in and I’m getting no help! My mother griped last week because I took too long (even though I kept telling her it was to sign up and take my placement test so I should get my sister to take me and well mom wanted to.)

Then I got an email from the nice ladies at the center where the classes are and was told that I needed to come at the beginning of this week to finish signing up for them, because they got in their forms for this year so I needed to do the updated ones.

I still haven’t went.

My mom promised and promised. My sister has been ignoring me ever since she said she would help.

I just don’t understand, my mom griped because I’m not doing anything with myself but how can I when I have no support from my own family?? Also I live in the country so we don’t have buses that I can take or anything like that and I have NO friends.

And the thing is, my classes are online so literally the only reasons I have to go down there are to finish signing up, to take my pretests once I finish the classes, and then to eventually take the “big tests.”

So I just needed to run down there to finish some things.

I asked my mother about it this morning and she turned around and basically started blaming me, I can’t do anything without feeling like I’m being a burden. She wonders why I stay in my room locked away from everyone.

I cried most of the night last night and even ended up having a panic attack, all because my family refuses to take stuff I do seriously and I just wanted to start working on bettering my life, for myself and kid. It’s all I’ve wanted and now I have no help and don’t know what to do.

I’ve decided to email the lady and tell her that I’m leaving the classes because I mean I can’t get there, might as well wait and get a job first so I can get my permit, license, then a car.

And as twisted as it sounds I think my mother does these things on purpose, I think she doesn’t want me to leave so she holds me in in anyway she can.

She helped in a role of completely destroying my relationship with my sons dad, she’s ruined several opportunities for me to move out and finally start on my own, I had a car that my pawpaw left for me when he died , then she turned around and sold it, anytime I try to progress my life in any way she rips it from me and then brainwashes me into it all being my fault.

Also I live in Alabama so I’m not considered an adult here until I turn 19 so that prevents me from a lot.

**Adding on- I do help quite a bit around here in any way that I can. She generally just tells me what needs to be done around the house and I do it, with no complaints.