My daughters dad

I love my daughters dad a lot but I feel like I deserve so much better we have an ugly past of him cheating hitting me and talking to his ex baby momma.. and yes I stood like a dumbass I love him, I deserve better.. sometimes he doesn’t want to make love with me and it makes me so sad I feel like after had our babygirl he doesn’t want nothing with me unless I ask him.. I’m sad. I feel like I want to cheat and have sex with some other guy but then I feel like I can’t I love this man and I can’t lower myself to the stuff he has done to me... help please