I'm fat but I know I'm not fat. The person I see in the mirror and my brain do not agree with each other. I have body dysmorphia, a fun time, constantly at war with yourself. It seems like each time I look in the mirror I'm getting bigger and bigger and I hate it. My clothes fit tighter, I'm counting calories and cutting back and skipping meals. I used to be skinnier than this. How the fuck did I get so big? I'm desperate to look the way I used to and it's just not fucking happening... I'm tired of life. It's a broken record. I just wish I didn't have to hate myself so much...