Hey I was sexually abused from lord knows when until I told in between my 8th and freshman year at church camp. The court was a hung jury (mom collected evidence against me and took all my 4-h money to pay for his lawyer. She always left me home alone from Friday night to Sunday night to take my 2 brothers (now 18 and 16) and sister (now 10) to go see him. When my senior year was coming to an end he ran over himself with a water truck from the hips down. My grandma and aunt told my lawyer who called me at 2am and asked me to close the case stupidly I said yes. My mother took off to be by his side 4 hours away while I was left in charge of taking care of my siblings she only came home to watch my brother graduated 8th and me high school. A week after graduation (2014) she kicked me out so he could be moved in and cared for luckily my now husband took me in. He’s remained in the house ever since. I’ve called CPS and talked to cops trying to protect my sister everyone says there’s nothing to do until there’s evidence. Today I sent this to my mother and I feel like I’ve made the wrong choice idk what to do I’m 35 weeks pregnant and need to watch out for my daughter and my husband doesn’t like me talking to them with him living in the house I feel hopeless ladies I could really use yalls opinions.... “I won't be out there tomorrow. Jake has been trying to have me do this for a long time, but I kept saying I wanted to tell you in person instead of of over text, but I'm clearly never going to get the balls to tell you in person. I haven't wanted to do this because I'm pretty sure you are going to side with him again and the thought of not having a mom hurts like hell.... I am never going to say that he didn't do what he did and I truly feel you know I'm the one telling the truth, but you can't live with the choices you've made with it being true so you continued to act like I'm the one lying. I love you, Mimi, and aunt Cheryl, but until he is out of the picture permanently I don't want to hear from y'all unless you need our help to get him out. Again I don't hate you for anything that you did I had to forgive you a long time ago to be able to be around you for Ellamae. I want to be able to come over to YOUR house and be a family. I want you to be a part of Amelia's life, but you can't choose both of us. He doesn't treat you right and you hate your life with him so I don't understand why it's so hard for you to cast him out. I should've said this a long time ago, but I'm scared to death it means I don't have a mom even though the way things are right now our relationship is crap.... thank you for the gifts, but I'll give them back if you don't want me in your life. I literally prayed for a boy so I could continue to act like everything was normal, but I can't stand to think he'll get to see my baby girl if you are there to show him. I don't like not being able to show you pictures because I know he'll see them... not being able to call you because I'll hear his voice... not be able to see you because you always bring him up like I give a shit about what's going on with him... I hope you hear me in this text if you'd rather hear it from me in person I'll drive out and tell you to your face. This is hard, but sometimes the right decisions are the most difficult ones. I've prayed I wouldn't have to talk to you and come to this bridge and he'd just die or disappear... I really hope you have the strength to do it right this time... if not I'll be waiting to hear from you again hopefully soon. Please don't have Mimi and aunt Cheryl message me I'm tried of hearing that I just need to forgive and move on if they do they will be ignored. I love you mom hopefully this isn't goodbye but a whole new beginning..”