I had my beautiful baby girl in February, and this past week, I made an appointment to see my OB to talk about PPD. I told my husband and he asked why. I shrugged my shoulders. He said “well something made you call, so what’s going on?” I told him how I sometimes get really frustrated with Charlotte sometimes, that I don’t feel like going out or doing much of anything. “getting frustrated is normal, and the not going out just sounds like maturing and falling into the role of mom. And that’s something you get like a few weeks after having a baby.” Okay.. but I used to enjoy going out and look forward to it. And POD can pop up during those first 9 months, and I’ve been feeling like this for a couple months. “That doesn’t mean you’re depressed. Besides, you don’t seem like you are. Okay. “Okay what??” I asked him what he wanted me to say, that it felt like he was trying to talk me out of going to the appointment that it took me days to build up the courage to make. Nothing else was said, and we went to bed.

Now he calls me a few times a day while he’s at work to check in on me. He called early this afternoon, and I told him it was a rough morning because she was just being fussy, I took my pre workout but didn’t work out b/c she was crying, so I grabbed the stroller to go for awake, but couldn’t figure out how to adjust the forward facing seat of the stroller. “Oh I know how you feel. That’s how I feel when I sleep in instead of getting up and going. It’s normal.”

I don’t know what to do. 😭 I cry constantly. Now I’m wondering if I am overreacting and just too in my head, I’m angry that he’s not supporting me. I feel lost and helpless. 😔