WARNING I RANT A LOT THIS IS LONG.

So I’ve known I was gay since I was about ten or eleven and I watched grease and all I could think about was ‘Olivia Newton John looks smoking in that catsuit.’ . Anyway, I didn’t really feel the need to tell anyone, I knew myself and that’s what mattered. I went into third year this year (Ireland’s school system is weird, I’m 15 tho.) and my friends all decided they wanted boyfriends, and so they got boyfriends. And then they decided I needed a boyfriend, so they kept trying to set me up with people.

I always said no, and one day at lunch when someone asked me what famous actor I would marry, I said screw it, because I was tired of them trying to set me up, and answered Anna Kendrick, launching into an hourlong discussion about whether or not i was gay, and I admitted I was. A few days passed, nothing happened, I was happy that there didn’t seem to be many repercussions. Except, then they would sneak it into the conversation, just a little comment here and there. The 2 girls who were doing it, I’m not that close with, so I didn’t mind, my best friends were really nice about it and that’s all that mattered. But then they started convincing my friends to use it as a joke, and telling people, including a guy whos been bullying me since my very first day of school.

People would walk by me in the corridors and just go “Ha, is a lesbian!” People I didn’t even know, because these girls told them. For the last month or so of school, I tried to take the high road, I ignored it, I didn’t talk to anyone who was spreading rumors about me, I asked my friends to stop, and they did because they didn’t realize it bothered me. But then, they told my brother who is a few years ahead of me in school.

My family isn’t super religious, but my mother was raised to be a die hard Christian, so she’s not really that accepting,when my older brothers friend came out as gay she wouldnt let him into the house. My dad isn’t very educated about these sorts of things so he doesn’t really understand it. And I was expecting that as soon as I got home from school on the Friday, that there’d be a bag packed inside my bedroom door, I’d withdrawn my savings from my bank account and packed all my precious memories, and that’d be it, they’d kick me out.

They didn’t, but only because my brother it turns out suspected I was gay, and didn’t tell them. I’m really happy that someone in my family knows and accepts me, but I’m also really annoyed that those two girls did that. They crossed a line, and where I grew up, the way to deal with it would be to tell them to F off. But I don’t really like that kind of stuff,I’m a bit of a black sheep of the family.

What should I do? Sorry this is so long, my life is kind of crap, I don’t get to express myself like this often.