I seriously fucked up. about a year ago, which was a month after me and my bf started dating, i cheated with my ex. i don't know what i was thinking or i don't understand but i hate myself for it. I was so scared to tell my bf because i was scared to lose him, which was the biggest mistake. My boyfriend found out today, and he's livid. he called me names, whore, cheater, slut, etc. we had talked about marriage and kids and even had a promise ring. im trying so hard to fight for him and praying i get a second chance but what do i do? I'm so numb i don't think i've processed it yet and i feel lost. someone please help because im a mess. i love him more than anything, and today was or is our 14 months. i feel like i've lost a piece of my heart and i want to crawl into a hole. i lost the love of my life, and I don't know what to do. I hate myself for all of this.