Just found out I’m expecting, strangely invested in how I want to give birth?

Question

First of all, please understand I am an obsessive planner. From the second we even started trying to have a baby, I wanted to plan out every aspect of pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood. My boyfriend is a very patient man, clearly 😂
I’ve been reading about unassisted births and different birthing positions. 
Is it strange that I really don’t want to give birth on my back?? I don’t know how to broach the topic when it comes up with my Dr, but I feel like either squatting or being on all fours is going to make the process a whole lot easier. 
My other problem is that I’m always afraid of acting like I know more about childbirth that the medical professionals who’ve been doing this for YEARS. This will be my first and I just feel very strongly about it but I don’t know how to make that clear without sounding arrogant.

Answer

Listen to those instincts 😊 those professionals (unconsciously) work for a corrupt industry anyway, and most of what they say is backwards to be frank. Go to a hospital and they genuinely believe they are helping you, which i can understand, i had an awful ER experience and I’m thankful to be here. But it is where you go to die slowly (might think I’m being harsh, look at what they feed you in the hospital). Aajonus wonderplanitz wrote about how his son was in a coma, and they wouldn’t allow him to eat fatty foods (raw butter mainly) but aajonus knew that it was helping his son, so he kept bringing it in 😂well, he was out of a coma with no damage whatsoever. There is science behind these phenomena. Every cell in the body has fat/cholesterol but they say it’s unhealthy.. billions of dollars spent to research and employ scientists, to push false information that has been debunked for over 30 years...anyway I digress! 
Compared to how things used to be done... They changed the hypocratic oath a while back, I want you to read what it said before and what it says now just to open your eyes a little bit. 
So for birth, I felt the same way as soon as I got pregnant. I wanted to have a say in what happens and I wanted to be able to allow my body to somewhat guide me, because our bodies are made for this, and if you have a healthy pregnancy/strong mind, you can have a natural birth. It is most definitely worth the experience. If you have issues you can always transfer to a hospital nearby. My birthing center is 3 minutes from the hospital for example. You’re right that you shouldn’t really be on your back when pushing. But you’re going to have to see what’s best for you when you’re there. Some people plan waterbirth, but feel better squatting on a birthing chair. You are allowed to change positions! There’s plenty of time. 
If you are weak-minded and easily overwhelmed, it’s going to take a lot of work and I would recommend you do NOT do this alone, unassisted, at home. There are many benefits to being home, the baby stays with you, youre exposed to familiar bacteria, you feel comfortable/more control at home... but if you feel you can’t handle it and are far away from help... have a plan. There are fantastic books by Ina May Gaskin you should start reading, it’s good to read about these wholesome kinds of experiences and not all the bad ones, because you understand the law of attraction I’m sure. Having a positive mindset and learning about how to relax your body and ride with the contractions is extremely helpful. Of course be aware of complications but don’t assume you will have them. Take this time to make mindful decisions and get in tune with your body and baby. The experience is what you make it.

Answer

I would definitely try to find a birth center or midwife practice that supports unmedicated births. 
But I would also not assume you know now what position will feel best come labor time. I thought for sure I would want to be squatting or on all fours for my second baby but on my back felt best in the moment. It was in water which changed all the dynamics

Answer

Any reason why youre not going with a midwife? Or a birth centre?They can be way more understanding and deal with normal birth farrrrrrrrrrr more than docs. And you can still use them in a hospital in most cases etc.

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hey mama! I suggest you watch the buisness of being born. it's on YouTube. after seeing that, I no longer trust hospitals. I cancelled my appointment with the OB and switched to a birthing center run by midwives. even though it's an hour away while my hospital is about 5 min away, I wanted to be respected during my labor and pregnancy. I originally wanted a home birth but my insurance didnt cover a midwife doing a home birth so I chose a birthing center.

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also want to add that when I was in labor lying on my back was EXCRUCIATING. when I had to briefly lie down to have my cervix checked that was when I experienced the worst contraction pain

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lying on your back is the worst possible position to deliver in (apart from standing on your head of course). The pelvis is actually much narrower when lying down than when in many other birth positions

check out this web page with information on a variety of positions
http://exaltbirthservices.com/empowering-choices/birth-positions/

Answer

I can tell you from experience that being on your back sucks. There are many other words for it but I won't use them here lol 
They had to use the vacuum and I had an epiosotomy (which I never really healed from.....11 yrs later I still don't look normal). I was hooked up to an IV and monitors etc....very unpleasant. 
With my second I was induced and up moving around more. They had squatting bars on the beds, I used the birthing ball, got in the tub. It was a much quicker labor and way more intense but it went so much better because I was off the bed. I did the pushing on the bed and would like to try to be off my back for that.

Answer

Reading these comments about American hospitals is making me thankful for the hospital I’m going to! I have never seen the documentary The Business of Being Born, although I definitely want to check it out now. But the hospital I will be giving birth at has multiple pain management options other than an epidural and is fine with mommas choosing no drugs at all. They provide birthing balls and peanut balls and other objects like that in each suite so I don’t even have to bring my own, as well as squatting bars and birthing stools so I can birth in whatever position feels best for me. They have some rooms with birthing tubs but all rooms come with showers and shower chairs if that helps with the pain. After the birth it is hospital protocol to delay cord cutting so I don’t even have to worry about asking and they immediately put baby on mom’s chest, doing as many checks and procedures without taking baby away (unless necessary of course) once everything is all good they leave mom and baby for at least one full hour of skin to skin before moving you to a postpartum room where your baby sleeps with you. They have a nursery but only use it if baby or mom have complications. As far as food they will let you eat as soon as you are ready after birth and they have a menu of healthy options, including vegan and gluten free choices, but if none of those appeal to you they have a list of places either in or around the hospital that will actually deliver food to the maternity ward, or you can bring your own food from home. They have a lactation consultant that visits after birth and will come back to your room as many times as you want as well as a free breastfeeding hotline you can call whenever you want after leaving the hospital. I’m pretty sure they also have midwives on staff there but I went with an OB and she had been super supportive of all my choices so far! I guess it depends on where you go 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

I’m not sure where you are but most hospitals (that I have experience with) in the US are very strict on how you labor. I would strongly suggest looking into a Birth Center or midwife. I had my first at a BC and loved it, am planning to have baby number two the same way 😊

Answer

The “medical professionals” might have been attending births for years, but they have never been in your body and they have never birthed your baby. This is YOUR pregnancy and birth, YOU are the one making the decisions, and you should not be afraid of coming off in any sort of way. Own this experience, mama! You can birth however you want!

Just found out I’m expecting, strangely invested in how I want to give birth?

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