So I met this guy at the end of May on Tinder, at that point I wasn’t looking for anything serious but we really clicked and I really enjoy spending time with him. We both smoke weed, he’s so generous and thoughtful and he treats me so well.

Over the past 2 months we have been talking we made it official, been on days out, he took me to the seaside for the day, he’s taken me out for meals, I’ve stayed over his house and met his parents and his cats😂they are lovely and I already get on with them quite well. He also met my parents and my grandparents on the weekend and said how lovely they were.

So he’s ticking all the right boxes for me so far, I feel like we have a real connection. I am starting to fall for him and I know he feels the same about me because he said he wants to tell me something (a good thing) on the weekend when he sees me face to face🙈

He had a serious motorcycle accident 3 years ago, he broke his femur and parts of his knee in his right leg and has metal inside it as most of the bone was shattered. He also suffered a bleed on the brain even though he was wearing a helmet and broke a few other bones too. This had a massive impact on his life, he had nearly 3 years of physiotherapy, suffered with PTSD, anxiety and depression.

He said the accident changed him and made him a nicer person, which I can definitely see. We both suffer with mental health issues so we are both able to support each other because we understand what it’s like.

Now here’s the bit I’m struggling with:

He told me that him and his mate used to be in a ‘gang’ and would have to threaten people who owed other people money ect. So he would only threaten people who had ‘done wrong’ and would never harm anybody for the sake of it.

Him and his friends would threaten these people with guns.... and knives....

He told me that he had a gun, but stashed it at his mates house which I was fine with because from everything he had told me I knew he had moved on from that all.

Anyway we had a lovely weekend together we went out for the day to a zoo, then in the evening we went to his mates house and chilled. It was a nice chilled atmosphere, music on and getting high.

This was the first time I had met his friend and he seemed really nice.

An hour or so into the evening, my bfs mate got out a knife from his draw and Marcus had a look at it and said that he would take it home and sharpen it for him. Then his mate went into his cupboard by the side of the bed rummaging around for something and eventually pulled out the gun that belongs to my bf😦

My bf took it off him and started playing with it when it was unloaded and shot it without anything in it, but it still made a loud sound which was enough to scare me.

Then he put the ammo in it and put the gun on safety but kept pulling the trigger and moving it around in his hands and said he wanted to take it home with him. Then he said to me ‘do you want to hold it?’ I was thinking is he for real right now?!

So I looked at him sternly and said ‘no’ so he mumbled to his mate actually I had better keep it here ennit mate. Which I was glad about, at least he could see that I was hurt about him doing that.

After about another 2 smokes me and my bf headed off to get some food and go back to mine. We had a talk about it and he said he was sorry and that he shouldn’t have done it and will ask his mate to get rid of it for him. He should have gotten rid of it a long time ago.

It just shocked me because he doesn’t seem like that kind of person, anymore at least. It has had an impact on the way I feel towards him now, but I told him how I felt about it all and he understands and knows he would be stupid to mess this up because we are so good together.

I just wanted some advice on how to get my head around it all and if anyone has any tips on how I can learn to trust him fully.