It’s been nearly eight years since I was last pregnant, now here I sit, green and dizzy at 7w. My pregnancy with my son was nothing out of the ordinary for the first part. I was sick as a dog for the majority of it, lost 12lbs the first trimester, steadily gained after, totaling 67lbs. My bp was high, I was swollen, and my legs had pitting edema. I had preeclampsia. I started having trouble feeling my baby move and my dr tells me he “forgot” to tell me that my placenta was calcifying at an alarming rate. I had to go twice a week for tests to check on my little one. Due to my placenta going from a grade 2 to a grade 3, he decided we’d induce me at 38 weeks.

The day of my son’s birth, I arrived as scheduled at 0500, already dilated 3cm. I couldn’t sleep the night before due to excitement, fear, anxiety, etc. They started my pitocin immediately and the dr ordered them to start it at a high rate because he had plans with his wife that night 🙄

He broke my water and things went pretty quick. The contractions were basically period cramps on steroids. A lot of back labor. I finally caved and asked for pain meds. They gave me Nubane, or so they said, I never felt a difference. Anesthesiologist came in and after SIX sticks, I had an epidural 🙌🏻 WHAT. A. RELIEF! Ten minutes later the nurse comes in and tells me she was “technically” supposed to check me before the epidural. And guess who was 8cm and cut off from the epidural? 🙋🏻‍♀️

I decided to lay down and try to nap as much as possible before time to push. I laid down and my son’s HR dropped into the low 20s. I sat back up as quick as I was able. I knew he was likely laying on his cord. So no sleep for me. Nurses rushed in and checked me again, it was time to push anyway... BUT there was no dr to be found. He had went back to his office. So they told me not to do anything and to lay still 🙄

Dr comes in and gripes about how I should have had a c-section like he recommended (he recommended when I was only 16 weeks before we ever knew of any complications, just because it’s “easier”) bc the baby was in distress (he wasn’t, the dr was just in a hurry). I pushed a few times and the dr said I wasn’t making any progress, so he vacuumed my son out of me, tearing me up and down, 3rd degree tears, and causing my son to have severe jaundice. I was hemorrhaging and had no idea. The dr comes up to my ear, says “if you fart out of anywhere but your ass, let someone know, I’m outta here!” 😳 A resident sewed me up, incorrectly, and they tried to force me to take a blood transfusion and transfer to another hospital, leaving my baby there. Neither of those did I consent to.

My son did a at home bill-blanket treatment for a few days and nursed like a champ. Because of his excellent progress, he didn’t have to be admitted by himself. It took me well over two years to regain somewhat normal sensation to my vaginal areas 😏

And now I’m sitting here wondering what on earth possessed me to want to do this again lol. I’m partly kidding, we tried for this baby, and I am very excited, but it’s like I had forgotten the nightmare that was the labor and delivery of my son. The good news is I’m NOT using that dr again, and I will ensure that what I want is how things will go. I know that if I had been able to progress naturally things would have been very different. So fingers crossed for a better experience this time around!