I'm really embarrassed but concerned. I lost my health insurance (until nov) so I haven't been able to have my post partum appt. ImNJ 8 weeks pp now. I've been healing poorly. I had an almost 4th degree tear and a couple of my sutures opened up. I can hardly hold it when I have to go to the bathroom both urine and bowel movements. I took a picture of my vagina so I could see it better and I guess I never really looked at it before I had a baby but it just seems not right. My poor husband wants to have sex but I'm terrified.. I thought about seeing how much an office visit would be without insurance but I'm nervous once I get there things will be wrong and I'll need to get something fixed. I also think I have ppd and I'm severely struggling with breastfeeding my boobs are in awful shape. Idk I guess I just wanted to vent