I can’t believe I’m writing this. I never thought I’d have to.

To start off, my husband and I got together at an extremely young age. I was only 15, him 16. He was a player, always cheating. (Never physically) he would just get mad and flirt. At 15, I didn’t care. After all, I didn’t think we would last. Well, at 16 I got pregnant and he enlisted in the military. He was in training all throughout the pregnancy, but he seemed to change. He would write me letters saying how much he hurt me and wants to make it work.

He came home and our baby girl was born. Everything was great.. until our daughter was 4 months old. We got married, I was only 17, him 19. 2 weeks later I found out I was pregnant again. We moved out into our own house, we started fighting and things got bad. I suffered with depression and began cutting myself and trying to kill myself. He was going through a lot and we just couldn’t get along. Our daughter died.. Once again, he cheated. Not physically.

We fought on and off for another year. A month after our one year anniversary he cheated AGAIN. This time with a girl from the gas station, he kissed her cheek, got her number and started texting her a bunch of bullshit. I left him and contacted her and told her everything.

He broke down and told her that he was an idiot and didn’t actually want her, he was just so angry and hurt and didn’t know how to cope with our relationship. Months went by and slowly we worked on ourselves. I got help, he got help.

It’s been over a year and we’ve had our ups and downs but we’ve made a lot of progress. Our son was just born last month. We have been happier than ever. Until last night...

I downloaded Snapchat (we both agreed to not have it) I only did so, to take pictures with one of the filters I liked. He didn’t mind that. So it’s 3am, he’s sleeping and I log on and to my surprise i see messages from last year from a girl that I never opened since I haven’t had it. They are screenshots of her an my husband, ON OUR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY. she’s sending him pictures, not really sexual. He’s telling her all this shit like he misses her, likes her, hates me, etc. Things that he always says, he doesn’t mean it he just says it because he doesn’t want to feel alone. This was a long time ago so I didn’t know how to feel. I didn’t know what to do so I logged onto his Snapchat account (he never changes his password) there I find all kinds of girls but of course, nothing was saved. The last messages was from the girl that sent the pictures to me and they were not recent at all.

I confronted him about it this morning, I asked for the truth. He claims he doesn’t remember it at all. He says he hasn’t downloaded Snapchat in such a long time and he doesn’t remember talking to anyone during that time, especially on our wedding anniversary.

We’ve come such a long way from his cheating and he did a complete 180 and has been great. I know many people can’t get through cheating but I did because of how bad it was and the fact that it was never physically. It’s been such a long time that I have felt like this, I have put so much into this marriage.

What do I do now? He keeps saying he doesn’t remember and I dont know if I should let it go because it was a long time ago or not. He says that he changed and even though he doesn’t remember, he would never do anything like that again and he was just a stupid teenager all the times he cheated and didn’t care but he wants our family.