Wanting a baby so badly...

So I have baby fever all the time and very badly but I knew timing was bad but now that things have gotten better I want one even more. My 3 1/2 month old kitten Simba died yesterday and he was the closest thing I could have and did have to having a baby, now that he’s gone I feel like I not just only want an actual baby I can grow and take care of but one that is my own. It wouldn’t be to replace him or anything but just to feel like a mother again. I was throwing up yesterday morning before he died and was thinking bout all the symptoms I’ve been having, all to show I could be pregnant. I was having slight cramps in my lower back so I figured let’s take the pregnancy test that you have in your closet before you take a bath... turns out it’s negative, from what I can tell. I just want to be able to have a baby but my body might not be able to and it’s crushing me. I’m not sure what I should do or not do... I have my babies siblings but like I said I’m not trying to replace him and they don’t give me the motherly feeling I’m looking for. Any advice??

I’m sorry if this is in the wrong group.