Well I finally got some sleep. I slept from about 2:30am until now 6am. I knew I wouldn’t get the sleep I deserve once again. I’m feeling a little better though about it all. I’m still indifferent about the way I am being treated. I had told him last night why I was crying and he pretty much just acted like I was wasting his precious sleep. He eventually apologized, but it didn’t feel too sincere. I believe I’m jealous. I’m jealous of the happy couples. I’m jealous that they spend time together being happy making memories. I’m jealous of the love I see posted all over social media. I’m jealous of the mother’s that receive help and are able to catch a break. I always feel like I’m a bad mother for wanting time away but I realize how necessary it really is. I just wish I meant more than what I receive.