Can I skip my best friends baby shower?

Question

A little backstory. My cousin has been my best friend my entire life, she’s the sister I never had. She is currently due in March, meanwhile I just had miscarriage. I would have been due 6 weeks after her. 
Here’s the thing, I’m still very sad about my loss (even started crying at the mall being around babies). It’s getting better but my heart still aches. My husband and I recently moved 4 hours from our hometown where my cousin lives, so I could always use that excuse. Should I be a “good person” and go, or is it ok to not go? 
Thanks ladies for your input I truly value being able to connect to those without feeling judged. ❤️

Accepted Answer

It’s fine to not go.  But I think she’d appreciate the honesty and no need to use the distance as the reason why.  It’s ok to admit that you’re struggling, even though you are happy for her

Answer

Well I’ve been struggling with TTC for 2 years, my cousin got pregnant her first month trying. I had a miscarriage about halfway through. 
But the baby is my God daughter and I love my cousin to absolute death. So I’ve been answering every phone call, going to appointments, I’ll even be in the room when she delivers. Oh and last weekend I threw her baby shower. 
So I understand your hurt but you’ll never get this time with your cousin back.

Answer

I would say either be honest about why you're not going or just go for at least a little bit to show some support.

Answer

I’m assuming the shower still won’t be for a few months. I’d wait and see how you’re doing at that time. Maybe give your cousin a heads up though that you might not be going.

Answer

If she's your best friend and she loves you and you tell her the truth why you want to stay home she should fully understand.

Answer

I would stay home but tell her the truth. It hurts but I imagine that she would appreciate it and understand.

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Just buy her a gift and let her know you can’t make it. You don’t have to tell her especially with her being pregnant and all. You don’t want her emotionally stressed. You don’t have to go though.

I’m sorry for your loss hun.

Answer

I am so very sorry for your loss. I have been there. I usually would buy them something from their registry so it is mailed to them and say "I am so sorry I can't be there in person because _________. Congratulations!"