I’ll be 17 in January, i’ve been struggling with depression for almost 5 years now. when i first got help i went to

counseling for about 3 months before i decided i didn’t like it at all. (many people tell me it’s because i had the wrong counselor). i was a really bad self harmer and recently i’ve been getting really depressed again. i haven’t been hurting myself but i feel like i need help. the issue is, i am not close to my mom at all and it is really hard for me to talk to her about things because of the way she deals with them and i know that’s not her fault but i don’t know how to talk to her at all about it. when i ran away a few months back and got taken by a man, i was in trouble for running away and i got no help from it. the police made me talk to this child center for helping and they recommended counseling to my mom and i said no to it... i just need help in finding some way to tell my mom i need help. i’m tired of feeling like this :(