My boyfriend of 7 months is 21 years old and he habitually uses Hydrocodone. He also was taking Xanax as well is the beginning of our relationship. He isn’t in college at the moment, but he does have a good paying job & works full time. For a while he was unemployed & depressed, furthering his issue with the drugs. His father is prescribed the Hydrocodone for his back pain, they are 10mg pills. He would always find a random excuse to go to his house, and while there he’d take some of his fathers pills. Side note; his mom was prescribed the same as well but in a 5mg, and he’d take from her too, but he was living with her at the time so it was easier & more convenient for him to take from her.

In the beginning, he had a job, but hated it, he’d take the Xanax before going in, and then some more afterwards. He’d tell me he needed it because of how badly it stressed him out & it made time go by quicker. I didn’t think too much of it, I understood. (Please keep in mind he got the Xanax from a high school friend, they were not prescribed to him personally) He’d switch it up between the Xanax and Hydrocodone just depending on when his mom would get her prescription filled. Eventually his friend stopped getting the Xanax and he was taking the pain pills everyday. If it was the 5mg, he’d take 4 of them, if it were the 10mg he’d take 2-3.

He quit his job and was jobless for about a month or 2.

I buckled down on him saying he was killing his liver and needed to get healthy. He was eating healthy, looked healthy, but inside I knew his liver was probably on max overload. He agreed and it went from everyday, to every couple of days. I have a full time job of my own so I wasn’t keeping all of my attention on him and what he was doing. He explained the issue was he was depressed about not having a job, felt like he was in a rut, and the pills made him feel better. I tried my hardest to sympathize and understand.

About a month ago, he picked the habit up frequently again, I told him he needs to get sober for himself & he’d say “I am sober” I told him taking them every 2 days is not staying sober, I meant permanent sober. He seemed to have brushed this off, and not much really changed. Here’s where it gets interesting, my breaking point.

He got his new, good paying job and starts making good money. He re-connects with an old friend, who has an older brother, they’ve all been a friend group for years and years. And on the weekends he starts going out with them again, he turned 21 at the beginning of September so he was excited to legally drink at the bars and buy alcohol & such. His friends older brother is 23, his friend is only 20 (Like myself) When he’d go out, he’d get EXTREMELY wasted. And keep in mind he was also on pills too. I always showed my disgust towards it, but I never lectured him, I didn’t want to seem like an overbearing mom. Now...

This past weekend is where all hell broke loose. It was Friday night, I was working late, I got off around 11pm. I call him multiple times because I had to go to Walmart for something and I wanted him on the phone with me while I walked in and out because we all know how scary Walmart can be at night. He doesn’t answer. 4 times. Thankfully my mom picked up and I came up with “he’s probably asleep I know he’s been working hard and napping everyday after work” And this is what I genuinely thought. Right as I get back in my car after Walmart, he calls me back, and I hear noise in the background, he tells me he’s about to be at his friend/friends brothers house. (Keep in mind they live 30-40 minutes away from us) I brush it off, I was annoyed but I went on home and he wasn’t replying. I had a gut feeling he was not at their house, and I assumed a party, because I know the road their house is on, and we have each other’s locations (mutual agreement for safety reasons) and his showed he was definitely not at their house. After I asked where he was and got no reply, I felt something was wrong, so I jumped in my car & began the trip there. Meanwhile I’m calling him nonstop and it’s ringing once then going to voicemail. He said they are driving to get beer and can’t talk because the music was too loud. I decide to check his location again and he was at a STRIP CLUB. I’m not insecure and obviously the strippers aren’t going to fuck him and he watches porn but something about him wasted going to a strip club had a burning angry gut wrenching feeling. Long story short I pull up, and call him over. His friend isn’t with them, but he’s with the friends older brother (who I would like to add, has been to rehab a few times for pills and cocaine) and some other random guys. I call him over, and all the other guys are shocked as hell, but I didn’t care. I said to my boyfriend “Are you ready? I’m taking you home now” and he says “why” I say “because you are not doing this, I have had it with you not staying sober, I want this to work between us but if you don’t get in this car we are done and you will wake up to an empty bed” The other guys get in this dudes truck and he tells me they didn’t even go in the strip club, they came to get weed and coke but he wasn’t going to do it, but that he just needs to grab his wallet & stuff. He is talking to them through the window for a minute, then goes around the other side, door wide open, the windows reflecting everything, since the inside light of the truck was on. He did cocaine. I saw everything. After looking me in my eyes and telling me he wouldn’t. I instantly start bawling, he gets in my car and I start screaming uncontrollably. Meanwhile he’s denying everything even though powder was on his nose I pull into a close gas station because I’m crying so hard I can’t see the road. I scream and cry and break up with him, he eventually breaks down and cries too, and opens up about the drug issue. I decided to give him another chance, one last chance to stay sober or else I was going to tell his parents everything, leave him, and make sure he goes into rehab. I love him so much but it’s been a few days and I still can’t get the image of him leaning down and doing cocaine out of a random guys truck out of my head. What do I do guys? He doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. But I don’t know where my head is at, I need advice, do I follow through and see if he can stay sober or do I go to his parents? Even though I said I’d give him one last shot?