So my bf goes away for 2 weeks every month and comes back for a week, well we been together for like 2 months now

I have my own issues and flaws so no rude comments

Well it’s been a rough 2 weeks sense he went away, he gets back in like 2 days

And this entire 2 weeks we’ve almost broke up once

Fought more than we would

Like every 2-3rd day we will fight

Rn it’s about trust

I have trust issues so bad like anxiety like a mother fucker

Right now I’m not sure if I should do this because I been in some fucked up relationships, ( where my ex has hit my mother ) and me

So me trusting is not just happening and that’s my fault I been trying so hard I sit and tell myself lies and shit I been trying tho so hard

This is my fav relationship I’ve ever been him but I can’t get the thought of him talking to someone else on snap or just doing something behind my back, i smoke weed to chill and when I do it clams me down but I can’t live with this feeling and he can’t handle it which I told him I understand, I wanna be with him I do but I can’t change apparently, has anyone else gone threw this ? I need help. My relationship is at risk. He’s also going back to his home town in December, for Christmas ( all his friends, ex’s, bars ) is down there and this needs to be fixed before cause if not it’s gunna end bad and I’ll be losing my mind worrying. I love him I do but this gaining trust thing is hard for my mental health.