Were you able to work through an affair on your marriage?

Question

3 month affair in a marriage. Person is remourseful and can’t forgive self. Other person is hurt by it along with immediate family.
Person that didn’t have an affair wants space and wants to go to individual counseling and marriage counseling but doesn’t think we should live together and doesn’t know what is wanted if he wants to be with other person or not anymore.
In laws want nothing to do with spouse that had affair.
Is any relationship irreparable?
Does it sound like spouse that didn’t have an affair still wants to try?

Answer

My spouse had an “emotional affair” (became very close to a female coworker, started telling her all his problems, wanted to go hang out, etc. Weren’t ever actually intimate  but sent nudes). When I found out, I was heart broken. He was remorseful and cams clean about everything, was willing to show me every text and picture (I didn’t want to see them), etc. We did take a week break, I stayed at home, he stayed with a friend and we took the time to decide if we wanted to stay together. If it was worth working out. We mutual decided that we loved each other but that the relationship wasn’t going to work if we didn’t get help. We agreed to:
1) marriage counseling 
2) open phone policy 
3) sitting down once a week and having a date together- just us two 
We decided to try these things for a month and see what happened. Our relationship really blossomed. I came to understand why he did what he did (and no, I’m not excusing it, but I do take responsibility for being slightly cold and giving him the impression I wasn’t interested in his life/work), we started learning to communicate better, we enjoyed time together and found out how rich our relationship could be. We have been married 4 years since then and are extremely happy. Nothing has happened since. We do still argue/ have disagreements but because we both wanted it to work, and both put in effort, it works. The big difference I see with our story and yours however, is that no one knew about what had happened but us, and we were both ready to work it out. 
Best of wishes. It can work. But if you two don’t want it or want it in different ways, it may not.

Answer

Why would you want to repair that. There are so many people in this world. Why waste your life on a cheater? Or be with someone you don’t give a shit enough about to not cheat on?

Answer

My ex husband and had an affair for a year and I didn't find out about till 10 months into it. We weren't even married for 2 years. I wanted to do counseling and therapy but he literally didn't give a damn so I packed my shit and took everything we owned and left. He never fought me for anything because he just wanted me to be out of his life so he could have a life with the mistress that he got knocked up. relationships are only repairable if both parties want to repair it.

Answer

Its repairable if both parties understand you cant have the old relationship again but you can create a new one. If both are willing to look into what went wrong and do the work together to build trust, forgive and respect.

Were you able to work through an affair on your marriage?

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