So when I first met my boyfriend we just wanted to be fuck buddies , things were going great and then the next thing I knew he was in jail , although we had only known each other for a couple weeks I had already started catching feelings but I was torn between waiting for someone who might not ever come back for me so I should move on or hoping he feels the same which will mean that I would wait for him.

It drove me crazy and I ended up fucking someone else , I regretted it as soon as it happened

When he came out he told me about the jail songs they would sing about someone fucking your girl while you’re in prison

And he said that every day he would say nah she’ll wait for me

He asked me if I had fucked anyone and I said no , I kept it hidden for months

Until last night when I had forgotten my phone in his pocket before I went home

He went through my phone and found me telling my friends about what happened.

He came over , we fought , I begged him not to leave me because I really do love him with all my heart and I know he loves me but something happened inside him

He kissed me , and was talking to me while he was doing it , his hands wrapped around my neck and he squeezed so hard it was like he was trying to kill me , I gasped for air and pushed him off me

I couldn’t let him get near me for the whole day, he said it was because of what I did , but he also said that it’s never happened before , which makes it even worse.

Eventually we made up and forgave each other for everything

But there’s always this fear in the back of my mind that it could happen again and who knows how bad it could get

What should I do