Should I let her meet her dad? A lot of this is just venting!

So a long story, for all you novel readers lol. I’m not quite sure if I want my daughter to meet her biological father or not. Please don’t just read the title and reply, I have a serious reason to not let them see each other. But I feel like I would be wrong if I didn’t get a second opinion from someone who’s not family.

It all started in March 2016. I was 16, hormones flooding, couldn’t wait to get it on, or should I say off 😂. I met my daughters father, his name is Stephen. He was 18, drove his own car, but still lived with his mom, whatever. April came around, I found out I was pregnant, I miscarried the day after I found out. Around July Stephen got kicked out of his moms and my parents opened our house to him as well. I turned 17 and he turned 19 in January. In February we moved out. By April we were evicted and we were homeless because no one wanted to rent to us because we’d only lived there for a month and we had never rented anywhere else before that. We lived in a campground and were in northern Indiana so it’s still cold. We took Stephens last paycheck and went to Tennessee where his dad was, and we both were working and supporting ourselves. July comes around and Stephen proposed under the fireworks, then August 15th he was laid off. August 23rd Stephen got his last paycheck and we went out to eat every week. This time we chose Pizza Hut which was pretty popular with our dinner dates. You can never go wrong with pizza! It was his turn to decide which pizza we got, and he put pineapples on it, like normal. I was a few days late on af and didn’t say anything because id been late before without a baby. The pizza comes out and I try to stomach those pineapples but it’s not a thing. I asked him if we had a couple of dollars. He asks how much a couple is and I say $11. He tells me yes, and we went to the Walmart down the road. I picked out the first response, the fancy one with the digital because I wasn’t gonna be confused again lol. We paid at the register closest to the restrooms. I took the box to the bathroom and peed on the digital test in the first stall. I placed the cap back on and sat it on the toilet paper holder. I scrolled the Facebook for a moment or two then looked back at the test, which was still blinking, and once I picked it up it switched to YES +

We were ecstatic. We were so happy to say we’d be welcoming a baby to our family, even though I worked at McDonald’s and my paycheck only covered the car payment. We eventually made our way back to Indiana for work. And we were homeless again at the campground. Only this time it was warm out and instead of a tent we were in a camper. I was able to quit smoking, Stephen was able to find work. It got colder and we were still in the camper so my uncle opened his house up to us for a month. Charged us $25 a week to help with bills and by the end of the month we got a house down the road from his. $140 a week isn’t bad for a house especially with all utilities included. And I could have my dog. HOW CONVENIENT?!

It’s now November and we know that I’m having a little girl. Her name is Adeline (pronounced adalynn) btw. December comes, and Stephen cheated on me with my best friend which is also my cousin. I knew that night but took me forever to get them to confess to it. Depression hit me hard because I wondered why I wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t eating and when I did I couldn’t hold it down, which was normal. I had hardly been able to eat the whole time I was pregnant. I lost A LOT of weight. But I was over weight any way so it wasn’t a big deal to my doctor. He just told me that if I lost too much weight he would hospitalize me. We grew far apart. I didn’t know my best friend anymore. January comes and on the 31st I had to do my glucose testing. So I was fasting which wasn’t a problem, not like I could eat anything how it was.

I was a babysitter for a different cousin, she has 2 about to be 3 beautiful babies.

Her daughter Trin ❤️

Her son aka Tank. 😂❤️

Stephen was great with the babies, was always playing with them, and they loved him, and he loved them. Somewhere a long this mess, Stephen started smoking spice (synthetic marijuana) and when I left to do my blood tests tank started to cry and Stephen smothered him. THE BABY IS FINE THO, he’s a big healthy boy!

I’m still talking to Stephen, I do love him. He finally admitted to cheating on me, and I forgave him. April came around and I gave birth to a beautiful 7 lb 1 oz 19 inch long baby girl.

I took her to the jail and he met her through the glass. Or summer goes by and I decided I wanted to meet new people and maybe move on. The first person I met and the first person I’d slept with after Stephen was Charles.he was my uncle’s best friend and He stole my heart. He was twice my age and this dude was great in bed. He knew how to talk and turn someone on. This man always got what he wanted. Then I found out he had a a girlfriend and was cheating on her with me. I continued to talk to him and sleep with him because I was stupid in love with him. He eventually broke it off with me and told me I was the psycho? Wasn’t too long after him I met Joey. I met him because my friend asked me to give him a ride and we just clicked. Joey is 23. I sound like a hoe for this but I had a one night stand with Joey. The first time I’d met him. He ended up staying with me and I just never took him home. I ended up pregnant the first time we had sex. I found out September 18th Joey and I ended up splitting up because he wasn’t allowed at my house due to him not being on the lease. He decided to hang out with my neighbor and he wanted to bring another female a long. This female slept with her biological brother, and she wasn’t the prettiest. I was hurt because Joey and I broke up over something stupid and I did something stupid to get back at him. I slept with one of his friends. Well I ended up trying to run his new Bitch over. I punched a window out in my door. I ended up having a whole mental breakdown, I ended up miscarrying and in a behavioral hospital. I left on a Monday and that same day Joey needed a ride. While I was in the hospital Joey had left that girl. We got back together that night and weve been together since. I love Stephen, but I’m not willing to work things out any longer. I love Joey and want to build.

Stephen and I October 1st 2016

After I found out I was pregnant

Breastfeeding Adeline ❤️

Charles

Joey and Adeline

Joey and I

My baby girl

The baby I lost 😭