Ttc fail!! I'm close to giving up!

Claudia โ€ข

UPDATE: My husband, not refuses, but prefers not having sex m-f. Why, bcuz those are work days. So if we ever do have sex it's Saturday nights or Sunday mornings. Obviously though if my ovu is during the week. I don't let him know when it's my fertile week bcuz he doesn't like "planned" intercourse. So I do try being a bit more "sexy" but since naturally I'm not into being sexy or teasing he always knows something's up. I'm extremely awkward lol. So when I try being sexy I start feeling uncomfortable and that doesn't help. He's quick to shut it down. ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„

Well, my husband and I decided to start ttc in January. Still no baby. This was his idea. He was on his way back from out of state when he told me he was ready and wanted to ttc. At first I was like ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿคจ๐Ÿคจ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„ bcuz I couldn't see his face through the phone. Thought he was totally kidding. Came home and no he was actually serious. So i thought. Fast forward to almost pretty close to a year with no luck. You'd think I'd be worried about something not being right with either of us and we'd go see a fertility doctor. But I think it's the LACK OF SEX!! At this point we average once a month. Maybe twice. And not on the day that counts either. ๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค I wouldn't be as aggravated if he hadn't of told everyone we know we're trying to have a baby. At first sure let's tell close friends. But now whenever we're out they ask us so and baby yet. And as always nope not yet. Let me say that since we started "trying" it still wasn't on my fertile weeks usually. It was just all over the place. And I mean like 3 to 4 times a month. And now I'm at the point when people ask I just started saying no he doesn't want kids. And that sucks. And sometimes he says nope something must be wrong with her eggs. Anf of course our girlfriends get defensive and say maybe its him. Anf I chime in and say no we just DONT HAVE SEX! He has it in his head that it just magically happens. I mean sure some people get lucky but he doesn't understand, I dont think, that there are better days to do the bd. But explaining to him anything is no good. In one ear out the other. He doesn't want to hear that he may be not right on the money.

Not sure where I'm going with this other than. It hurts that he put this idea that we'd really start trying but when it came down to it its sex when hes up for it. I'm just so frustrated. Angry. Any type of input would be great!