I love him but I’m confused

Kenna

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 11 months. He is my best friend and I can’t imagine my life without him. He is a very sweet boy but there are some things I hate so much about him.

Few things. He is 16 and I am 17. I am going to college next year and he will be a senior.

1. He lies and then acts like nothing happened. Ironically this is something I use to do but no longer do, but he does it all the time and I’m so scared he will be mad if I mention it.

2. He’s very honest. Honestly a dick sometimes. He will say such mean things and then back it up with “I’m being honest, would you rather me lie” EXAMPLE: I showed him how I edited my headshots for dance auditions and he said “You look bad in all of them” and then I argued with him about honesty for like 30 minutes. EXAMPLE: I wore short shorts and I lower cut top to school and he said “you look like a hoe” and I was so upset but then he just said “would you rather me be honest, or lie to you”

3. He will believe anyone else before he believes me. I will tell him anything and he will argue with me until I end up crying. Then he will go talk to someone else and they will say the same thing I do and he will agree with them. Then he comes back and puts words in my mouth.

4. He doesn’t listen. I will say things and he won’t retain it. I could tell the same story 4 times in a row and he would just keep responding generic answers. And I will ask him to stop doing something and he will keep doing it until I get so frustrated I cry.

5. He burns bridges with people and I end up fixing them. I am always making excuses for his behavior.

6. He is over physical and over shares about our relationship. He will tell people about out sex life and about will touch me in public. It makes me so uncomfortable.

7. He is so jealous of other guys and talks about how he thinks I’m going to cheat on him all the time. Makes me feel awful about myself.

8. He talks about wanting to marry me all the time and I just don’t see it. He isn’t the man I’m going to marry. We are so different.

9. Overdramatizes and very short temper. He can get mad super easy and I hate anger so I get so scared and just wanna leave and always end up apologizing.

But. I love him so much. I look at him and all I can do is smile. Everything on the surface is great. I tell him everything, he is my best fiend. If I’m not doing school or dancing I’m with him. He makes me so happy and can not imagine not kissing him all the time or having my best friend. He is great in so many ways that make up for everything he does wrong. I love him so much but i know it can’t last. Ahhhh