This is gonna be kinda long...

Backstory... Was having trouble trying to stay friends and confronting my best friend about her lies and try to salvage the relationship.. or if I should just move on..

And here's my updated thoughts and my conclusion:

First off for those who commented on the original post.. I listened and y'all are definitely right, and one particular woman even made it a point to get real with me.. and I appreciate that. And so I came up with a last ditch effort to see if it was worth it anymore.. after i made a semi negative comment about an old friend of mine to the supposed "best friend" I thought to myself why am I so salty about my old friend and it came to me..

I was just kinda jealous of her.. so I told supposed "best friend" I'm ready just to be at peace with people in this point of my life holding on to negative feelings towards other people doesn't do shit for anyone but turn yourself into a bitter unhappy person that people don't want to be around.. and she was just kinda fucking rude about the whole thing.. and then she made a real eye opening statement to me

"I have friends who I respect and just keeping a child alive and getting married doesn't make YOU a good person" and honestly it spoke two me for 2 reasons.. the girl we were discussing has two children and isn't married... I have one and I am married and just the wording of the message, and just in general, her not even knowing this person well enough to pass judgement on her.. told me that this was probably a very sneaky, well thought out attack on me

and there's no way she had mistaken who we were talking about here. So then I dug a little deeper and further into my history with this "best friend" of mine and realized..

And let's see if it makes a link for y'all as well,

let's take a look into the lies she'd tell:

-she lied to me about a catering business she was going to open and said I could be her business partner.. had me make a logo for her, business cards and go look at places for the business, and that in the mean time shed pay me for my work.. I quit my steady reliable job in a salon to help her. (Should have been done there 🤷)

- lied about building a 4,000sq ft. House on the top of a mountain (she moved shortly after I had to the mountains) on her then boyfriends parents land (this is after I met my then boyfriend who is now my husband and is the father to our child)

- lied about the restaurant she "opened" and "owned" in the mountains, then she moved out of the mountains on the border of South Carolina

- continued to lie about the house she was building on her now ex boyfriends parents land

- lied about buying a house, being sued, buying a car "new off the lot", lied to other people about her boss not being a racist.. after she told me "my boss doesn't wanna hire black people because they are lazy and just want to work for a few months to collect an unemployment check when they quit".. which is why her boss is being sued.. not my "best friend" where she said she'd have to file bankruptcy because she was being sued personally.

- lied about her boss giving her a raise, only to say "I'm giving you this raise under the stipulation that if I need money you will give it to me."

Anyways those are just the big ass lies over the years.. and they always seemed to come after shed ask how I was doing and I'd tell her about all the good shit going on in my life and it seemed like a "I'm doing better than you" one upper kind of thing.. to which my husband and I would just kinda laugh it off.. because why lie to me.. I wasn't her friend because of what she had or didn't have.. I was her friend because I liked her.. and before I did some digging I thought she did some nice things for me but it was all just for ulterior motives not to actually be nice.

So what did I decide to do.. pull away slowly.. and let this relationship fade away like I should have done along time ago. Not gonna end it abruptly.. Because I know how she works.. so I'll just go out on a flat note, not even bother with telling her I know about her lies because it's pointless and honestly I'd just rather end this as quietly and as painlessly as possible.

Soo.. Bye dear friend.. I really cared for you.. and just wanted someone who equally cherished me as much as I had cherished you.. but you fucked up far too many times and I don't see any chance of you changing your ways with me.. and maybe if there was even one shred of decency in you, you'll learn something from this relationship.. but honestly I don't think it'll happen and you'll probably never even noticed that I left until you're completely alone. I'm not one to give up easily.. but you my dear friend I've tried and tried over and over again.. and I tried to convince myself and everyone around me that you were actually a decent person just kinda lost..and every time I just looked like a fucking idiot. I've made my peace and don't need you to sit here and lie to my face to try and keep me around.. I'm not that stupid or that lonely that I need you in my life.. I held on to a few memories and ignored all the red flags and the signs because I was rooting for you.. I hope you the best in all that you do.. just a helpful hint.. stop idolizing your boss, she's a schmuck and treats people like shit.

Sincerely,

Your dearest, closest, warmest not actual friend 😘