Sad right now

I’m sad that being 36yo I don’t have the partner I need for the rest of my life. I have decided divorce is my only choice. My husband is not affectionate or cares about supporting me. We don’t talk. We don’t have a good relationship. We haven’t had sex in about 2 yrs. he drinks and smokes and takes medication. He makes me angry. I really don’t think I can make this work. We have gone to counseling. I’ve told him what I need and he just doesn’t care.

I have 2 amazing kids.

I’m scared of starting over. Will I find someone who will really be there for me?

It’s not where I thought I’d be.

I want the family dream.