I’ve known for a week that my HCG levels were not increasing the way they should and then on Thursday they started decreasing. I’m currently at W5 D5.

I am just waiting for my pregnancy to officially end. It has been 48 hours of hell with no end in sight. I told my husband, it’s like knowing someone is hiding around the corner and is going to kick you full up in the nuts as hard as they can. You have no idea when or where it’s going to happen but you know it’s going to happen. The anxiety is killing me. I have a doctors appointment scheduled for Wednesday.

I hate this feeling. Every little cramp, every twinge I think, here it comes, and then it doesn’t.

This just fucking sucks. I want it to be over. I want to try again and here I am. Stuck in limbo. I’m still technically pregnant but none of it matters.

Has anybody been here before? Has anyone else known their world was about to be ripped apart before it happens? How do I get through this?

HCG levels:

11/21 - 613

11/23 - 886

11/27 - 1694

11/29 - 1571

12/01 - 987

12/05 - 503

Help.