Can I get some advice? Tips?
This is a little lengthy, sorry.
My spouse and I have been together 6 years, married 2 is them. Our relationship started off great. We had great conversations and were always out and about doing things together, went on walks, traveled etc.
About a year and a half ago I sat down with my husband to just tell him how I had been feeling. This involved him barely talking to him, aside from hi how is your day what is for dinner, like a true conversation. I told him that I was feeling frustrated that I did all of the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping etc. well time has gone by and the same thing is happening. My husband has a shop space where he works on cars trucks etc, he is gone 4-7 nights a week. Sometimes on the weekend he is gone from 8a-10p. He gets off work hours earlier than I do, yet he still will go to shop until 8-9 and work on that stuff (this has no income involved) I get home late, around 7 cook clean etc. I’ve told him many tomes I couldn’t imagine getting off work and just not getting dinner ready or trying to help around the house before he got home. Ok so I’ve had this conversation. So. Many. Times. I do not ask for a lot, we split bills, not gifty people , I never say “take me out” nothing. All I’m sad about is his lack of interest in truly helping after I’ve expressed what I need some help with, and that he is gone so frequently. I’ve told him about this recently and I feel guilty because now he has been home, but I just feel like he’s not mentally home. I don’t want to “make” him come home, but I could never imagine wanting to be away from my spouse that frequently. I’ve asked over and over if I’ve done something to upset him, he says no. I ask if he’s interested in another woman, he says no. I just feel like my marriage is falling apart and I just don’t know what to do. I’m trying to be patient but what do you do when you are so verbal about what someone could do to make relationship better and they do and say nothing? I have nobody to talk to. I don’t want to think that all marriages/ relationships are like this. I want things to be fair and to feel just a little bit of love from my spouse.
Do you have any advice? Has anyone been in the same situation?
And please no saying I’m needy or something or that I tell my spouse what to do. I make my own money, we don’t share, I do all of the housework, grocery shopping, cleaning , cooking. Everything. All I’m asking for is him to actually want to spend some time with me and put a little effort into our marriage.