No Christmas baby this year. 😔

Feeling completely defeated. This time last year we had to have a D & C with our very first baby at 10 weeks. We've lost 2 more since then. Now my periods are never on time. Is that normal? AF just came today so no Christmas baby for us this year either. I feel like I'm failing as a wife as my ONE job is to build a family and I cant even do that... 💔😭 so thankful I have such a supportive hubby.