We are 1 out of 160.

We are not just a statistic.

This is our story.

The life of Myla Elizabeth Stogner.

Our daughter was STILLBORN.

We are a taboo.

We are the people you judge.

We are those people you never want to speak about.

I will never let our daughters story be untold.

We are the face of STILLBIRTH.

It was a day like any other ordinary day. (All though Austin and I had a fight the night before, I know neither of us will ever forgive ourselves for that. However we know that was not the reason our daughter Myla Elizabeth died.) We never thought the night before would be the last night we all slept together in our king sized bed.... alive.

Let's rewind to the begining of Myla's life. We both decided we wanted to have a baby. We were both so excited, playing the little games involving gumball machines. If it came out pink it will be a girl, if it came out blue it will be a boy. Or involving Easter sixlets (mostly pink and blue). We held mulitple pink and blue sixlets in our mouths and would spit one out. Pink it will be a girl, blue it will be a boy. Might I remind you we were not pregnant yet. It took us nine hard months to become pregnant with the baby we had always hoped for.

Nine months of ovulation tests and pregnancy tests. Nine months of sometimes feeling hopeless, nervous I wouldn't fall pregnant. Nine months. It finally happened the moment we were least expecting it. I found out I was pregnant the day after Veteran's Day. We were both so scared yet so happy. The first person I told was my sister. She helped me get insurance and set up a doctor's appointment. I wasn't able to get my first doctors appointment for a month and a half, they were totally booked up. Everyone was having babies. A few weeks after we found out we were having a baby I started having sharp pains in my stomach. We decided to go to the ER. Dr. Boone was his name. They wanted to do a sonogram to make sure everything with baby was okay. At this time they said I was about 5 weeks along. Dr. Boone told us there was a sac but no baby. They couldnt find our baby. He told us I was either having a miscarrage or an ectopic pregnancy. He gave us no other option as to what was going on. I had no bleeding but my HGC levels were really low. We called my sister and she came to comfort us. We thought we were losing our baby. An hour or so later a nurse came in we were still shook up and we told her what Dr. Boone said. She seemed like she was mad at him. She told us he's probably just saying that to save his ass incase it does happen. He must not know what an early pregnancy looks like. They had someone who knew what they were doing look at the sonogram of my sac. It took a while but they had someone come in and tell us about the sac and showed us that it was a healthy sac and there would be a baby inside of it soon enough. We were discharged shortly after. I did not miscarry our daughter, nor was she ectopic. I grew a healthy baby for 41 weeks.

One month later we had our first doctor's appointment. It took them a solid five minutes to find our daughter's heartbeat. They had to get an older, more experienced person to find her. We heard our baby's heartbeat for the first time, it was the most glorious sound we had ever heard. They set up an appointment for us to see our baby for the first time later that day. We were so excited and so happy. She looked like a little gummy bear. She was going crazy moving her little arms and legs. She was the most perfect thing we had ever laid our eyes on. The sonographer took her measurements and told us our due date. I was nine weeks along. Due July 22, 2018 six days before my birthday. We decided to tell everyone when we were around 12 weeks. We made little gift boxes for our parents with a pacifier a baby bottle a bible scripture and a picture of her. Everyone was so happy. Everything started to become so real. We were having a baby!

We did a gender reveal when I was 20 weeks or so. We had smoke bombs and the color came out pink i was so excited! I got to have my baby girl! In our house we have two boy dogs and a boy cat and one girl cat. I was so happy we got to have another girl in the house! Our parents got together and we picked out colors to paint her room. Her room is so beautiful with pink and grey all over with stripes on one wall. We had our baby shower she got so many gifts from our wonderful family and friends. Her room finally came together after that. We had everything we needed for our baby girl. Her room was set up perfectly just waiting for her to get home. Our hospital bags were packed up neatly with everything we would need for our stay at the hospital. The count down was real.

I had the most wonderful pregnancy. No morning sickness. No problems with Myla. She was the most perfect healthy baby. The day I went into labor will forever be engraved in my mind. 7-27-18 The day I found out my baby had no heartbeat. I felt a little off that day because Austin and I had a fight the night before, but I didn't think anything of it. We went and got Austins medicine and stopped at Whataburger to get breakfast before I took him to work. Myla was still moving. I was cleaning getting everything ready for Myla to come home. I was scheduled to be induced on July 30th. I went into labor around 2 pm that day I started having contractions. When I went into labor my contractions started out 3-5 minutes apart. I didn't think anything of it because Myla was still moving. I ran a bath to lay in to soothe my contractions until Austin got off of work. I started to lose my mucus plug and I knew it was time. I went back and fourth from the bath to the bed for a couple of hours. I didn't know it at the time but I felt my daughter die inside me. I felt her last three hard kicks inside my tummy and the only thing I thought was "Man, she is so ready to come." I was in so much pain, yet I was so happy for her to be here. Austin got off of work early that day. He came home about two hours after I went into labor. I asked him to finish vaccuming the floor because was in too much pain to finish. He vaccumed, put our bags in the car, and we took off to go have our baby. He called our parents and my mom met us there. We went to our room while a nurse tried to put a monitor on my tummy to hear our daughter's heartbeat. It felt like we were waiting forever for her to put the monitor on. I was moving around in pain, so I thought that was making it hard for her. I just kept thinking "Man I wish she would hurry up." She said "Let me go get another nurse to help me." Another nurse came in and still nothing. They brought a doctor in and a sonogram machine and put it to her heart. Then we heard the words no parent ever wants to hear, "Baby has no heartbeat." I looked at my mom and Austin standing in front of me and my heart just sank. Austin and I held each other so tight and cried. That was the day we found out our baby had no heartbeat.

Our hospital stay didnt go how it was supposed to. Instead of bringing joy, it brought sorrow. Instead of planning late night feedings, we had to plan a funeral for our daughter. I was in labor for 25 hours. I was really sick. I had gotten an infection. I had two epidurals and countless amounts of medication. Myla passed away from corioamnionitis. After 25 long, hard miserable hours I gave birth to our daughter Myla. She was a perfect 6lb 9oz 21 inch long baby. I had her at 2:41 pm on my birthday. My daughter and I share a birthday. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever laid my eyes on. Austin is the greatest dad. The way he helped me through labor and birth was the most incredible thing ever. He showed us the unconditonal love he has for both of us, and I will forever be greatful for the man and father he has become.

We got to spend a day and a half with our daughter. It wasn't nearly long enough seeing as though we were supposed to have a lifetime with her. A few people came and got to love on her and give her lots of hugs and kisses. Austin and I got to change her clothes. We put her in her daddy's favorite outfit. A pink and white plad shirt with some little jean shorts and a sun hat. Frames of love came out and took tons of pictures of her. I will always be greatful for them and the kindness they showed to our daughter. We held her so tight and memorized every inch of her little body. Before we knew it it was time to say goodbye to our first and only baby. It was time for us to go home. We had to leave without our daughter. That was the hardest thing we have ever had to do.

This isn't the way it was supposed to be. We were robbed. We don't get to see our daughter grow up. We don't get to see her first steps or hear her first word. We don't get to see her beautiful smile. We don't get any of that. We will miss out on every holiday, birthday, first days of school. We will miss out on everything. Now we live with suppose to's and should be's. This is how we have to live for the rest of our lives. We live with a piece of us missing. We had everything. In an instant it was all taken away. This shows how cruel life can really be.

This is our story.

This is the story of Myla Elizabeth Stogner.

She will never be forgotten.

We have a daughter in heaven.

Please don't forget about my baby, she still exists.