I'm having a bit of a problem. I posted not long ago asking for tips on being on top and I'm honestly bewildered. The first time I had sex with my guy, we were both a little drunk and had to try again in the morning to fully finish the deed. It was great both the first time, and in the morning. The next time we had sex- probably a week later- it was great for me but I kind of failed him when I took over. So I asked for some tips and I didn't really get any constructive advice. Well tonight we finally had some time to get together and it was a little awkward and we ended up stopping.

I think confidence is a big part of my problem because he is very experienced. I also think part of it is that I am a touchy feely, foreplay kind of person and he is not super romantically inclined, which isn't the end of the world because he's really amazing. I have been in a rut and am finally starting to feel sexy again.

He's been really nice about it and tells me not to apologize but I can tell he's got a little sexual frustration brewing. Is it just something I have to try and get past? Any advice on things to try? I'm very comfortable with him, even more so than most of my exes, so I just don't know what's wrong. And I don't want to lose him either.

Something to note, too: I recently came to terms with more than one occasion of assault during a relationship and confronted my ex. It was a horrible conversation and I left it feeling like I had no closure and like he'd turned it all around on me. I truthfully didn't feel like it had impacted me as much as it should have until now and I do wonder if this could be a part of my issue with sex. I have always had great sex and felt confident in my ability to pleasure my partner. My wonderful guy has been super respectful about my limitations, and he knows what happened. But I don't want to bombard him with whining either. I'm seriously so emotional about it all because I feel like I ruined my belated birthday sex and it's my own fault.