January would’ve been the month I deliver my son but instead I went into labor in September. He was stillborn at 20 weeks. December has been a tough month for me. It’s the month i was suppose to be on maternity leave. I hope January is the month we conceive our rainbow baby. It would be bitter sweet. In no way I’m trying to replace the baby boy i lost. I think of him often and cherish every minute I had with him. Idk.. I just Hope January is the month we get a bfp. Please January 2019 be good to us.