too guilty to quit 😭

Lola

My LO is 5.5mo. I'm primarily pumping, I'd say 90% pumping and bf the rest of the time. I quit AT LEAST 3xs a day in my mind and sometimes I really do "quit" for a session but I always feel like 💩 about it so I start back up 😭😭😭 why cant I just quit!!!! I am sick of being a slave to the pump. I'm sick of not having time to do other things bc I always have to pump. and I'm sick of my breasts, one in particular feeling enflamed 24/8. I am miserable but I do it for my baby. I never thought I woulda made it this long. I struggled so much in the beginning. my original goal was to be able to do it at all/1mo, then once i got going good it was 3mo, and then finally 6mo. i am 2weeks short of 6mo but i am STRUGGLING. it's crazy i made it so close but really ready to pull the plug this close. i have at least 600oz in the freezer. why do I feel guilty about quitting 😭😭😭