So I have been reading this book, called ‘The Secret’ and it is a book persuading you to see life differently and more positively and as a result, to attract everything you have ever wished, to you. I have reached the ‘secret to relationships’ section and have read it all. It says that if you want people to care about you, appreciate you, or at least notice you, you have to first appreciate and love yourself, and stop giving so much if you haven’t still found yourself. Then just imagine people as being your people, and they will eventually come.

It is not just about boyfriends. I have noticed that I haven’t been at a good state with my family members and friends recently. We fight and disagree a lot and I also feel distant and that nobody really cares about me. And then I realized that I have spent my whole time giving whatever everything and offering anything I could to see people around me happy and satisfied, yet staying at the same depressing state of not receiving in return. And yes, the book is right, I have never actually appreciated myself. I have never loved myself. And then I am wondering why I am a 17 year old which no boy has approached ever not even for a talk.

Yesterday I have made a typical teenager move: I followed my crush on Instagram. And that was before I have read the chapter in the book. He never followed back. I still want to believe that he hasn’t been online in Instagram for this whole time (something not impossible, but strange for teenagers). I don’t blame him though, he doesn’t even know me. Anyhow.

How do you love yourself? I really feel like it is a million pieces puzzle which I will need ages to solve, if I ever manage to do it.

I am thinking of creating a pros and cons list about my appearance and personality and improve the negatives on my personality and accept my flaws. I am not sure how that will work though.

What is loving yourself like anyway?

This is me. It would really help me if you found some pros and cons in my appearance. It will help me because everyone sees everything differently.

Thank you ❤️