🚨Preteens and Teens PLEASE READ🚨
I want to be one of the adults on here that doesn’t down you for your questions, concerns of your ever changing body, and give you some genuine advice if you’ll read this through and let me. I know you take what adults say (especially adults on a random app) with a grain of salt. I remember being in your shoes not too terribly long ago myself, but I know times are changing and you may already be questioning the crazy things you hear about people a grade or two below you are doing. But I also know there’s a lot going on with you mentally and physically, and you may not know where to turn.
Let me start by saying I was what seemed like the stupidest teen, I started talking to a guy who was 3 years older than me and thought the only way to keep the older guy was to lose my virginity to him. My first time having sex the condom broke, I know this because I found a piece of it that night. I ended up pregnant and then miscarried. To this day that mentally gets to me. I regret my decision and wish I had waited.
My experience with trying to grow up too fast knocked me on my ass just as fast as I stood up. I know a lot of you are already doing things you know maybe wrong, but you feel like you’re more mature and know what you’re doing. Most women on this app probably were too, but instead of being helpful to some of you they knock you down. The anonymity of this app seems like a safe place to ask your questions, like it should be, but some women are just bitter towards you.
I’ve got some tips for you if you’ll read them, some maybe more things to think about than tips :
•Please do your research! With the whole internet at your finger tips, look things up! There are so many ways to be proactive in your health and gain knowledge of tons of things you should know! Look up signs of ovulation (this could help you know when not to have sex to help you not get pregnant, look up sexual diseases knowing some common signs and symptoms could help and you should see what you could possibly end up with! Nobody thinks they’re gonna catch something until they do! Learn about how periods can sometimes be late (not pregnant), learn how sperm can stay alive up to 5 days if a guy ejaculates in you, look up the statistics of different birth controls!
• If you decide to have sex, please be smart about it, boys/men will say anything to get you to agree to sex and sex without a condom. “It’s uncomfortable” “I know when I’m about to cum I’ll pull out”. Men know what to try to say to get what they want.
• Your virginity is special! Don’t let anyone make you think differently. Just because all your friends have lost theirs doesn’t mean you need to.
• Please don’t try to get pregnant on purpose. You may know someone who’s pregnant in your school or trying but for your’s and your possible child’s sake, please don’t. Have fun and be young. And a baby will not make a man stay.
• It’s okay to not be interested in growing up too quickly. Adults talk about how “mature you are for your age” but that doesn’t mean they want you to grow up too fast.
• As great as it sounds that the guy you like and your friends would never leave you or talk bad about you... Most of them will turn on you in a heart beat.
• Guys may ask for nudes, but with each picture you consider sending, remember they may show their friends and before you know it the whole school has seen you.
• PLEASE consider this - with every social media platform there is, you never know who you are truly talking to! What you think could be a hot guy from another school asking for nudes and to meet up, could actually be a 40 year old child predator. Please refrain from adding random people you don’t know on social media even though I know having a big following makes you seem popular and all, but catfishing is real even when you think you know everyone.
• Drama and fighting is never worth it. People will run their mouth all day long for your WHOLE LIFE. And if you want to go to a good college, you can get denied over that. Be the bigger person and walk away.
• The people you associate with is assumed to be a reflection of who you are until you prove other wise.
• If you’re going to be sexually active, make sure you’re protected. Have your own condoms so there’s no excuse and don’t let a guy tell you he’s “too big”, have you seen the condom challenge? People fit condoms ON THEIR HEAD. Think about birth control while it isn’t for everyone, it could be a good thing to at least look into and possibly speak with your parents and doctor about.
• Find an adult you can trust to talk to about things! I know some home lives aren’t ideal, and sometimes you just don’t want to possibly get in trouble by your parents and that’s okay! But have an adult you can confide in.
• Please remember you’re young and have your whole life to try things! You don’t have to party, have sex, drink, smoke, do drugs as a teen. Or at all!
• Try to do your best in school! I know it’s just middle or high school but it can affect what college you go to, the possibly of the difference of student loans or scholarships.
• Some is you may realize you like girls instead of boys, and that’s OKAY. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for something you can’t change. And some of you may meet someone or be friends with someone who likes the same sex, that doesn’t change anything! Please don’t bully them, but support them.
• And above all know your worth! Know you have a voice and it doesn’t make you lame to say no. If that guy or girl isn’t listening and you aren’t comfortable leave. No means no and don’t ever make yourself uncomfortable to make others comfortable or like you.
I hope this reaches some of you, I’m sure there’s a hundred more tips I could give but these are just some basics. Some women on here and in the real world are here for you, cheering you on to be a teen, ask your questions, and grow into the women we know you can be.
(This is meant for teens in high school, I know some get married at 18 to their high school sweethearts and hopefully are stable to have have a baby or whatever, once your 18 to me you’re considered an adult.)