I fell for someone much older at work
Really need some advice ladies...I met the perfect guy. He’s respectful, kind, gentle, witty, clever, literally the nicest guy I’ve ever met. We share so many common interests and I’ve never connected with anyone like him before. He’s one of my closest and best friends.
We’ve been flirty with each other and hang out every other day alone, but things really accelerated last month - we crossed the line during Christmas (I was the one initiating and really pushed for it to happen. He kept saying he liked me too much to risk losing me if things go south). I actually cashed my v-card but I didn’t tell him that and I plan to forever keep my mouth shut. Not that it was a big deal for me but I didn’t want him to feel extra pressured.
Now here’re our obstacles:
1. We work together in the same team. He’s superior in title to me but I don’t report to him, he’s not my boss. However company policy prevents any office relationships within the same org and I’m sure people are already suspecting.
2. He’s 16 years older than me. I honestly don’t mind at all but he’s hesitant and always tells me that I could do so much better than him, that he’s grateful enough to have known me in his life.
3. He’s not from the States and he’s planning to go back to his home country in mid 2019, permanently. This was already decided and he’s been totally honest with me since day 1.
I really don’t know what to do. I actually don’t mind start interviewing for another job, or the age difference, or even moving to his country, for God’s sake if he really is the one. However we are not even in a relationship and it seems to be too much trouble and risk. He himself keeps telling me that he’s not worth all the trouble and for me to sacrifice that much. I am just really torn and don’t know what should I do...
Should I be more realistic and hold back or follow my feelings? I just don’t want to regret any decisions I’m making now in 10 years.
Any thoughts help. Thank you all❤️