I love you. I love you more than you could imagine. You mean the world to me. You show me how kind, caring, and thoughtful you can be. You’ve shown me who you are as a person. You’ve shown me how strong you can be. It’s been a year and I don’t regret a second of it.

When my dad died, I pushed you away but you were there for me. You stayed up with me while I cried and you showed how much you care.

Through a hard time you taught me how to laugh and enjoy life again even after I lost the most important person in my life. You gave me hope. You really got me to think about a future with you.

An entire year with you and you acted like a gentlemen. You held the door for me and kissed my hand. You gave me your jacket when I was cold and held me tight. You always put yourself closer to the street so I was safe.

But sometimes... I really don’t like you. It’s normal though right? We’re teenagers. We’re in high school. I just sometimes don’t get you.

Things have happened between us and I’m just as in the wrong as you are but we aren’t talking about that, I’m talking about the little things. Things we haven’t gotten past.

You didn’t like my guy friends so I dropped them. As soon as there was a girl I didn’t like, you said she was necessary to us. Maybe she was but only to you.

Whenever you didn’t get your way you’d give me the silent treatment or say rude and hurtful things.

When you were blatantly mean and taking stuff out on me and I called you out on it you said stuff like, “don’t get me mad and I won’t say this stuff.”

When another guy flirted with me or called me, it turned into my fault. You acted like I could control his actions.

You told me I was better than my friends, that I don’t need them. You told me they treat me bad, and maybe you’re right. But now, here I am, alone with no friends and nobody to talk to besides you.

When we argue or I upset you and you’re not getting your way, you will grab me roughly. It hurts.

Maybe you’re right, maybe I am sensitive. But I don’t like being upset. When I cry, you don’t cheer me up. You tell me to stop crying because it “breaks your heart” even though it’s your fault in the first place. Sometimes you just tell me to stop crying because it gets you mad. You even think I fake it on occasion. But I don’t.

You say it doesn’t seem like I love you, but I’ve gotten tired with how you’ve treated me. You yell at me for my attitude, but you created it. Imagine if I told you all this, you’d look me in the eyes and say “so everything’s my fault?”. I know how you are. We bonded over psychology but I never thought you would try and use it on me. I shouldn’t have been so naive.

But here I am, still with you, because I love you. After everything we’ve been through and I’m still here. I plan to stay here for as long as you need. I just wish you would treat me like the man does in movies. Maybe those guys are only in movies for a reason....