Deep Trust issues

My husband has cheated on me twice and once attempted to but I caught it early. It was never physical. It was talking on the phone. He’s told them he loved them. And told me he was just friends with them. We’re working it out and he’s changed but I can’t stop thinking about it. I replay it in my head all the time. I’m still hurt so badly. I don’t like him being on his phone. At times I wish I wasn’t with him because I’m still so hurt. But I love him