Something doesn’t feel right, Is this real love?

Am I deserving of this treatment?

Will anyone ever love me like he does?

But I know I can change him!

But I know he loves me!

But I have kids with him!

Everyone is just against my relationship and no one knows how he is with me!

But it just happened once!

Ok it happened again, but I love him and he said he was sorry!

He “loves” me,

I know I can change him!

It takes 7 times of running away for a woman to escape her abuser, don’t let it be you, my mother was both physically and sexually abused by my father in front of us I was only 10 years old when my dads brother tried to rape me, I was 5 when I saw my father rape my mother, I was a baby and grew up in a home with domestic violence, my father went to jail after he beat my mother, and almost caused her to loose her baby, I was only 5, it was normal for me to see the police in our apartment because my father was drunk and high, trying to beat my mother and accusing her of cheating on him, it was the crack, or whatever he would take, I was only 5 when we went into a rescue home, I was only 5, I was 10 when I almost got sexually abused, I thought he was just playing a game, I was only 12 when a stranger ripped my clothes off and tried to sexually assault me, God protected me, I was lucky I got away, I was 16 when my cousin exposed himself at me but I ran and locked my self in a room, I was 16 when my uncle touched himself while I pretended to be asleep terrified of what he might do, if I woke up, I was 17 when another uncle asked me to give him my virginity “ so it can stay in the family “ he said, it took me a long time to love my self enough to realize that’s not the kind of attention that I want, if you think well he’s only hurting me and not my kids you are wrong! https://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/abuse-defined/ learn from my experience, don’t let you or your daughter be the next victim