I finally did it, right now I'm sitting in the courthouse filing an order of protection against my ex.

I got tired of ALL my shit being destroyed, the screaming in my face & on top of his lungs in my parents house. The controllingess and the manipulativeness , the threats. ALL OF IT

I feel guilty and I hate it, when I play everything over in my head I know I'm not wrong. There is something mentally wrong with him, theres a switch and once its flicked theres no reasoning with him. His eyes get big and scary and go blank. Theres no calming him down. I keep telling myself to stay strong but this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. I thought he was my soul mate at one point, my best friend.

This is devastating but I'm praying it only gets better from here