ugh i guess this is my rant

i cant talk to anyone about it anymore because i know how annoying it is, everyday gets harder and kinda just want life to be over with. I feel like i’ll never get over it and knowing he’s in love with another girl breaks my heart even more. Really thought me and him had something but obviously i was just convinced that. We hung out on NYE for 2 whole days! 2 whole days together just for him to turn around and cheat on me with the same girl!! He has made me lose my confidence i just feel so ugly and worthless, i don’t know who he wants me to be but i just wish i could be the girl he loves!! The girl he is in love with lives in CALIFORNIA!!! Me and him live in Maryland!! She lives across the country, this breaks my heart every single day. Turns out hes moving to LA soon too and i know he will definitely try to get with her.. I let her know that i still talk to him and i guess she ended their friendship and he told me “You ruined everything with me and her, shes the only person i care about and i regret ever seeing you or meeting you and i hate you” Im so heartbroken!! im sorry this is all over the place, this hurts so bad :(