I just need to vent..

Erin

After months of planning, crying, and discussing, my husband and I decided back around christmas to travel 4 hours away so that i could attempt a VBAC. What i really want is to try. I cannot attempt a vbac where i live. I was planning on going to stay with my aunt and uncle and deliver at a hospital about 5 minutes from their house. We literally just sent our first half payment for our doula. Today I get a call that no hospital is in network with my insurance in the area I will be delivering at (healthcar.gov must have lied that my insurance would be in network when I signed up for insurance last november). Somehow the doctor I would transfer to is in network, but not the hospital. So now I can either try to get an in network exception ( which will probably not work) or I can just decide to have a c section here. I feel broken. Because of insurance and hospital rules I cant even attempt the birth I want. I'm 32 weeks and now everything is up in the air. I just want to cry. I know that a c section is not the worst thing in the world, but I just wanted to try. This pregnancy has been so difficult to enjoy because of this decision.