So to start with some people will probably be negative towards me, but I don't really care rn. Basically my brother is doing the worst possible thing to me. The way our church works is any man wishing to propose must go to the pastor and the pastor actually talks to the woman. She then tells the pastor her answer and he reports back to the man. A few weeks later they are "announced" in our church service. This process takes several months. I've had a feeling that my brother wished to marry someone (I don't know who yet) and today I found something out that I'm hoping and praying isn't true. Tonight he went to visit with the pastor, and i was quick using my mothers phone. Now this might sound like snooping but I don't feel bad about it. I scrolled a few messages back, and he had sent a long one asking my mother not to say anything about it to me till he was announced in church. Normally the whole family knows before that. I remember him saying that if he ever got engaged he wouldn't tell me til he was announced. The past few Sundays I have been worrying about that quite much. I'm a fairly sensitive person and I will admit that😋. Idk how to say this but if I find out Sunday morning that he's engaged I honestly won't want to go to his wedding. I also probably would start crying, which sounds babyish. But really I just want to know who he's being engaged to and I want to know before it's told to the whole public.

Idk it's just a frustrating situation and I needed to vent..

Update: he came home over the moon... I think we all know what that must mean. He still hasn't said anything yet tho.