Weird ass dick?

Ok so me and my husband are separated... he was in my dream last night and things were getting sexual. Well I go under the covers to give him a bj... and like his dick looked like a shriveled up stick... uh okay. It started to get normal after he started getting hard but it was very odd. Im also very bothered by the fact that he’s in my dreams because I miss us being together so bad. We’ve been separated for a little over a week and it was sudden. Even before things weren’t normal. None of this is my choice I want/have been trying to fight for out marriage to work but it’s one sided. So why does he keep showing up in my dreams? Esp in a sexual manner.